My Life, My Encounters and My Experiences...

Finally going!

2007-09-14T07:03:00.000+08:00

I never thought that this day would come so soon! It's the leaving Malaysia part which undesirably overwhelms me with the arousal of both apprehension and excitement. Well my attitudes on starting a new life in a new country are pretty much ambivalent; part of me wants to go whereas, the other part of me wants to stay.

Crap man, living on my own would mean doing my own laundry, cooking, managing my monthly expenses, stay disciplined and not get easily tempted and waking up by myself; which unfortunately isn't exactly my forte.

It's now 7:10 am and I have less than 2 more hours to spend with my house of 3 years. I can't believe I am saying this but I am starting to miss it all already; my room, my brother, my sister, my car, my dogs, my everything!

Dunno how I am gonna manage when I am over there... I'm just praying that everything will be alright... Anyway I'm off...need to finish packing!

I broke my golf pro's 3 wood!!

2007-09-12T19:14:00.000+08:00

Its been really some time since I last blogged coz I really had to sort out my technique on the violin, do exercises, pieces bla bla bla... Anyway my lessons with my violin teacher, Gosia have been going great; if I may add, better than the previous ones I had months ago! She even told me that I have improved, but need to work harder as I still have obvious problems with my bowing, intonation and etc. Kinda worries me as I believe that I may be the worst violinist in the academy up in Glasgow! I'm gonna be facing intense competition from Hungarians, Poles, Jews, Russians, Americans, Koreans and who knows, Swahilians! Already I'm so edgy about my mini audition that I would have to undertake when I get over there. I just want to make a good impression to my professors and improve! God I would really do anything to improve! Name your price and I will comply except death... Sheesh I've been enthusiastically practicing 6 horus a day for the past 2 weeks; hopefully I can reach the level that Latifah Hamzah is at now...da damn friggin genius!

Anyway after violin, I headed down to the driving range where I had golf lessons with my substitute pro, Bob. He tells me that I have improved tremendously and that I started out really great on my drivers. Here comes the juicy bit: he let me try out his woods and I accidentally hit it behind the security pole, as I was preparing for my back swing!!!!!!! RM700 3 wood! Afterwards, told dad about it and he took it really well...much to my surprise! Couldn't stop apologising to Bob about his club! Poor Bob...he looked as if he were gonna cry when he couldn't hit straight on that club...if I may add, it's a rare limited edition 3 wood he got 2 years ago and they don't sell that shit anymore! WHAT HAVE I DONE?!

Later on, I went to Subang for a haircut and a coffee, seeing as I'm gonna be practicing my ass off on my violin tonight... Already made plans with Meng Heng to go down to KLCC Chinoz for a drink ahh and that would be after having a family dinner at some snazzy Japanese restaurant...as much as I would rather have steak...

God please, and yea, PLEASE help me improve in my violin!! Amen

FUCK MY DRIVER!

2007-09-05T01:45:00.000+08:00

Fucking bangala nabo cibai keeps complaining even though he used to be some shit taxi driver probably because he has some problems with his ku ku ciao...no wonder this fucker needs tongkat ali. I fucking hate his face, the way he drives and the way he treats me and my friends. If he's complaining, why didn't he study? Probably too stupid to read books and numbers that scared him like spiders! Fucking lowlife cunt

I am on borrowed time...

2007-09-03T00:34:00.000+08:00

I officially have 12 more days to go before I head off to the UK for uni and I tell you, I am as scared as hell! Till recently, I have been sending countless emails to my uni confirming my place there, shopping for winter clothes, learning how to cook, going out with friends and NOT practicing my violin as I should be doing!

Anyway, Saturday night, went out with Brian, Colin, Ayman, Steph, Ian, Greg and all to this fancy new bar I discovered called Frangipani, which happens to be owned by Clement's piano teacher Eddy Chew. Great place to go, especially if you are in the mood for snazzy margaritas but its a tad too pricey.......did I also mention that it is a gay bar?! We spent our time there drinking, chatting, catching up on old times and asking one another the normal but annoyingly pervasive question about where everyone's heading off to for uni.

Waited almost 2 friggin hours for Fatin and Aznal to arrive but killed time drinking and smoking. Before they arrived, met 2 guys who were having a smoke with Eddy at the balcony; Mika and Doug. Respectively, Australian and British who are currently studying in London. Hahaha Fatin thinks that Doug is cute!

After Frangipani, most of us headed to Daryl's house for a few rounds of poker, which if I may add is fucking huuuuugeeee! Being my first time playing poker, I lost like 20 bucks....sigh...

After the game, and still being tipsy from drinking heavily, Fatin drove my car to her place and I headed with Aznal off to his house, where I spent the night. Went out looking for shisha but it was already closing, consider the time being around 5 am!

Lacking the practice

2007-08-29T11:42:00.000+08:00

Shit man, as of now, I only have less than 2 hours to practice for my violin lesson! The past week has been spent on going out with friends, partying and staying up late doing nothing and missing out any form of quality practice. Dammit I have to do 5 etudes, a piece by Mozart and another by Bach; lets not forget the orchestral excerps. I am fucking gonna be screwed...

Feeling angry yet guilty...

2007-08-26T20:51:00.000+08:00

Psychologists claim that as human beings reach a certain age, conflicts with parents, both mother and father are seemingly inevitable.

It all began today at dinner. Mom had commented on how well I have behaved ever since I came back from my Singapore trip. After she said this, I told her that I have been "extraodinarily" well behaved. My dad, trying to be a smart-arse retorted, "Do you think so?".

Feeling superfluously frustrated due to the fatigue accumulated from the late night pool game with Ayman, sleeping at 4 am, and my party that I had endured last night, I stupidly became angered and vociferously fired back, "I know damn well I have!". Wrong move you fucker!

Feeling unfilial and remorseful, I told him that I was sorry. Having been a jackass to him, he warned me about not having paid for my fees at the conservatory in Glasgow yet and that I should say sorry when I actually cool down. Conspicuously angered by his threats, my dad and I argued relentlessly for at least 10 minutes until my food came; which I aggressively swallowed in like 5 minutes, figuratively speaking. My mom tried to console me but it was no use. I was irrevocably infuriated by my dad being skeptical. I was overwhelmed by smouldering guilt; knowing that I had spoken so rudely to him. I know that potential readers would regard me as being unfilial and ungrateful but I love my dad. He can be so unreasonable sometimes and he sure can be a fucker! But, he's my dad...

I can't really think of anything to write now coz I'm still so fucking pissed off! I'm gonna have a smoke now... Stay tuned.

Emo?

2007-08-19T03:18:00.000+08:00

I'm so God damn fucking tired! A day ago, I had spent the midnight practicing with sheer intensity, as I have a mini audition when I arrive at the Academy. I finally got some rest yesterday after almost having a car accident twice on my way to violin lessons in the morning, hanging out with my former classical guitar teacher, attending Clement's early birthday party and driving all the way to KLIA to see Jon Chay off. Hahahaha my guitar teacher and I spent the afternoon having tea at a mamak stall, smoking cigarettes and talking about my encounters with the "self-proclaimed" professional guitar teacher, Mr. Simon Cheong.

Man! Talking about that dispicably arrogant man brings back annoying but funny memories! Hahahaha how pretentious he was, trying to be a smart ass at everything, denouncing other instruments, teachers, and my intelligence. Funny how I never heard him play, coz he didn't wanna wind up looking like the complete ass he was truly designated to be. Probably isn't a very professional performer as he himself claimed to be.

I woke up at around 11am and drove decisively to SS2 with the intention of collecting my results for my Grade 5 classical guitar. After having obtaining my result slip, I headed for a coffee at Coffee Bean, as I was still paradoxically fatigued from not catching any sleep for 37 hours. There, I met Dawn and her mother, who was waiting for her brother and surprisingly buying herself a cup of bubble tea! Hahaha anyway, got her UK number, which kinda reassured me that I would have some company when I finally move there.

A few hours later, most of my cousins, relatives and my dad's friends cheerfully congregated at our house to celebrate the 50th wedding anniversary of my paternal grandparents. I played a wedding march on my violin while the rest of my cousins showered my grandparents with gifts.

To commemorate my farewell, my aunts and grandparents gave me a bottle of Ralph Lauren Blue and a 300 ringgit angpau! Hahahaha drinks anyone?

Later, my cousins and I had a drink at a mamak stall where they could tell that I was conspicuously tired. Actually, I was pondering on what the effect of moving to the UK by myself would have on my life.

After the drink, my cousin Ken Li and I sat down to talk. We talked about how emo and reclusive I was back in Taylor's College, my problems with my previous crushes and shit that we went through throughout our teen years. Thanks again for the talk! =) Great to talk to someone that cares, even though she did unintentionally ignore me when I was trying ot tell or ask her something when we were having family events or on MSN.

Still pondering on my retrospective mishaps, I had a fag outside my house and called Faisal and Jit to discuss my problems. It's like when you talk to them, you feel as if you have a certain calibre of control over your life, which felt great! Hopefully I would adopt this demeanor when I'm finally settled and studying in Glasgow.

As of now, I have to be more sanguine and stop smoking, even though I do not do it on a regular basis!

Paintball!

2007-08-15T23:22:00.000+08:00

I rose today at around 11:30, had my shower and then left my house for Clement's at 11:45, despite my mother's rigorous but somewhat unsuccessful attempts to wake me up earlier. As I arrived at Clement's I was greeted by his brother, Kenneth and his friend from year 8, James. Kinda struck me that James was a year 8 student because, he was just so tall and big for his age! I almost mistook him for a year 10. I think he comes under 5'10 and 180lbs which is gargantuan for a boy in year 8!

Anyway, we spent almost an hour waiting for the rest of the group knowing that they woke up late too. Our plan was to have a game of paintball but to add to our already long list of burdens, James happened to be a British citizen and needed an identification card to play the game but given his situation, he was to bring in his passport instead. We waited another half an hour for him to retrieve his homekept passport. I must say, he's a real funny guy, great to talk to and all as opposed to Clement's cynically demeanored brother, Kenneth. While waiting for the rest of the guys, I killed time attempting a piece by Liszt on Clement's piano and checking my facebook account.

After the guys arrived, I gave Thomas a lift in my car, leading Yi Xuan and the others to Desa Water Park for paintball. To my surprise, my driver did not exhibit any traits of rudeness...yet.

At the Water Park, we had an hour of paintball where I was subsequently "shot" in my chest for standing out of the bunkers and later on my face. The mark's still kinda red around my titties! Hey! It's my first time! Though Ian speculated that I was trying to be Rambo! Hahahahahaha.

After the game, Thomas being the fool he is known to be pointed his airgun 30cm at my right leg and pelted me with paint, assuming that his gun was empty. Trying to scare me lah! My leg bled hurt like hell okay... I reciprocated by grabbing my airgun and chasing him around the enclosure where we had our game! According to him, he almost "pissed himself" thinking that I was pissed off at him hahahahaha! We're even Tom; after all, I tried to shoot Fariq on his back before that fated shot!

Later I gave Ian, Ann, Fariq and Hafiz a ride to their place near Bangsar and that was when my driver made his displeasure of sending them back so conspicuous that they could sense it through his heavy breathing and complaining to me about how they should find their own transport home. I mean that's your job man and you should work stoically. You weren't any better before you became our driver. You used to drive taxis, tankers and trucks for a living so be greatful and shut up bitch! I've put up with his nonsense for almost 4 years! Funny how he complains about his problems to me instead of to my dad, who is his legit boss! Sigh...scared of the dai low lah!

I went to One U to meet up with Verun, Chun Wai, Jit Tim and Jon Chay after sending Ian and all back. Apparently it's Jon and Verun's farewell as they would be leaving for the States this Friday =( We met up with Jon's friends from ADP (American Degree Programme) and yea, they seemed really friendly and outgoing. It's not everyday you meet such people...

We later had dinner at TGI Fridays where I stuffed myself with a burger and ice cream cake, courtesy of Jon, Chun and Jit! Hahaha I didn't eat in like 24 hours! There I caught up with old GIS schoolmates and friends such as Faisal, Cindy Tseng, Pei Nee and of course her boyfriend, Ka Ven; a real nice guy! Very open minded and warm!

After dinner, I followed Jit to the bread shop, where he bought some sourdough bread for his mom and I proceeded home afterwards. Back home I had my shower and am now typing this post. I need to practice my violin now! Feeling guilty I spent more time out than with my violin!

Busy Day

2007-08-14T22:00:00.000+08:00

I pretty much spent most of my day running up and down for music and golf classes. The first one I had started at 10 o'clock and it was a violin lesson. Needless to say, my shifting technique needed work, especially in Bach. My intonation and left hand position was as you would say in French, tres terrible! Kinda stung me hard as violin's my main instrument! Yea the truth hurts! I mean, I really yearn for kudoistic proficiency in this instrument as it is my passion; but that means more practice, not just practice, but good, slow and focused practice! Violin's hard!

After violin, I headed straight home where I was reminded by my mom that my brother had just received his results for his IGCSEs. To her surprise and if I may add delight, he had done okay in most of his subjects except for ICT hahahahaha! Congratulations bro! You've become educated! You're finally moving on with life and may you do well in what you desire to pursue! It's pretty obvious that it is something to do with animation or mangga! Hahahaha not too much of a mangga fan but I find them okay as watching them transports you out of the harsh and sordid reality of this dog eat dog world. Thank the Lord for creating Dr. Blackjack! Its really a beautiful show that has so much meaning and integrity! It's really touching to say the least!

Later on I had a piano lesson and as I had earlier anticipated, loads of room for improvements. Sigh I was really contemplating on playing the more challenging pieces like the ones by Liszt, Prokofiev, Rachmaninov or Chopin...

Had golf in the evening and to brighten up my day, my coach told me that I had improved. Hahaha 2 more weeks before I can play on the greens! I'm really aiming for a handicap 5, then my dad'll just shockingly stare at me sink birdies and eagles instead of play like he would have initially planned! XD "How did you do that", he would ask. I would reply, "I was born a golfer!". Hahahahaha he would certainly not hesitate to follow up with a bitchslap!

I came home all worn out and tired. I listened to some Chopin on my radio then had dinner. I wasn't really in the mood for practicing, knowing that I could just continue with it tomorrow.

I keep pondering and telling myself that I have to work hard in order to achieve whatever I want in life: so much that I would be highly motivated for a brief moment. Then, my momentum would just die away, giving way to my notorious laziness. Hopefully I could sustain self-motivation to keep me working hard at my musical career when I'm in Scotland. After all, it's the only chance I've got and I really plan on making it work. It's all a matter of changing my attitude...really.

2007-08-13T00:22:00.000+08:00

I'm just so damn tired today. I spent half the day practicing my violin and checking my mail. Later on, I headed out to dinner with the family, where we were treated by a former colleague of my father to some "Hong Kong concept" food which I found rather distasteful. The adults sat at one table while all the youths sat at another. What really pissed me off was that the quality of the food served at the youths' table was way worse than what the grown ups had received. They had a ten course dinner while we stoically put up with just two; one which was some chicken soup and the other one which was undeniably a combination of steamed chicken, broccoli, abalone, mushroom, tofu and squid! Arrgghh! Kiamsap bastard! Hahahaha anyway I only had like half a bowl of rice! I'm going mamak now!

Rush Hour 3!!!

2007-08-09T22:48:00.000+08:00

I started my day with a piano lesson with my teacher, Mr Loo Bang Hean who was to my surprise, rather pleased with my last minute practice I had put in for his lesson. Well, at least I took the initiative to show up for my lesson, which I have been skiving for the past 2 months! Kinda reinforces the fact that my piano playing, let alone technique, is crap! I can't even play my scales without slipping off the keys hahahahahaa! Sometimes I wonder why I still manage to play the Beethoven sonatas, Chopin waltzes and Bach fugues he gives me; considering my palpably repulsive technique! But hey, what matters most was that I showed up!

As I was driving there, I got lost looking for the man's house! What I anticipated to be a ten minutes drive took almost an hour! I kinda forgot where he lived so I went to Cheras instead fo Subang! Riveting! Kinda bad for a person who is gonna pursue music as his career but I'm lucky that piano's not my main thing!

Later on, I went home, took a shower, practiced some piano and bought lunch for my brother before I went out too meet Brian and other GIS friends at One Utama. I met Brian at an A&W, where he was having lunch with Aarti and the first thing I noticed was that Brian pierced his ear! I kinda thought that it was fake at first, knowing that his parents would not give in but I was convinced when he showed me the other side of his lobe...interesting. Brian, if you are reading this, how in God's name did you persuade your parents to let you pierce? It took me months man!

After lunch, we went up to the movies where we met the rest of the GIS guys, including those who had recently graduated from their colleges overseas. To my surprise, everyone looked the same except Leon, who had palpably sported a moustache and long hair! I must say, I kinda like his new look albeit it being retro and all!

Most of the guys, especially Chun Wai and Fariq thought that the highlights I made to my hair were ah beng! My plea: "I was influenced by the Jay Chouness of Jit Tim......hahahaha! I kinda think that too, well my motive was for me to look like Edison Chen! Once again, my attempts have been thwarted!

At the movies, we watched Rush Hour 3 which according to me, would have to be the best movie I have ever seen in like 3 years! Its 10 times funnier than both the first and second and I really do not mind watching it hundreds of times! Moviegoers who have not seen this film, my message to you is simple..."You MUST watch this film! You have never lived until you did!". And like all good things, the movie ended in like 5 minutes, figuratively speaking.

After the movie, the whole gang congregated at Chilli's for tea, ordering drinks and nachos. Knowing that it was still happy hour, I seized my opportunity to have a beer! :-) What can I say? I love my beer! Be it Tiger, Heineken, Carlsberg, Konig Ludwig or Budweiser, nothing beats a beer!

On my way home, this Honda City tails my back for like 10 minutes until I started taking the piece of kenasai driver around in circles; from Shah Alam to Klang where I happen to pass by some kampung town and the fucker gets himself lost! YES!

Anyway, had dinner, practiced golf, piano and violin and here I am now, typing out my blog thinking of something better to type about! Anyway that's it for today! Stay tuned for more posts!

Not really Bach? Or Woods?

2007-08-07T19:12:00.000+08:00

As of now, I only have less than a month and a half to prepare for my mini audition in Glasgow; well I auditioned for the Academy using tape recording so I have to prove that it is me playing in the recording by giving a little live performance. Its times like these that I regret not going for an in person audition, where I would have everything over and done with! So much for relaxing after college...9 month holiday wasted!

I'm struggling with practicing here as my selection of pieces aren't exactly cake, well they would be if I bothered to practice...or maybe not! Shit shit shit so little time and I have to do a Mozart concerto, a Paganini piece, a Partita by Bach, orchestral excerpts by Mendelssohn and Elgar and loads of other technical studies! Did I leave out scales, arpeggios and double stops?! Looks like I gotta get off my arse, change my attitude and do my 8 hours, otherwise the Academy'll decide to kick me out leaving me languishing in my room as my mind repugnantly wastes away!

So far I've done about 5 hours, leaving another 3 more for later when I return from golf practice and you don't wanna get me started on the golf thinghy, which has been going on for like forever coz I never show up for practice or lessons. Kinda hits me hard that I suddenly realise I'm wasting my dad's money and giving him empty promises. I just gotta make sure I get my handicap before Scotland hahahahahahaha...which I pretty much doubt I will! Ahhh well time to change that! I'm off for practice now!

Sick as a Dog

2007-08-06T13:28:00.000+08:00

I've been feeling sick ever since I came back from Singapore around 3 days ago. What started off as severe fatigue due to nearly a week of daily drinking had escalated into undesirably sporadic sensations of body aches, feeling cold, sore throats and moodiness. Since yesterday, I have tried to make my condition seem inconspicuous to my parents; especially during dinner but in the end, I decided that enough was enough and asked them to take me to our family doctor for a check up, much to their displeasure.

It's just remarkable that even though there were as little as 4 patients waiting at the clinic, it took me almost and hour and a half to wait for my turn as I later came to realise that the doctor was no better than some junkie with withdrawal sympthoms! He took like so many pauses in between checking my heart beat, blood pressure and my throat, as I looked at him disgruntled while he contentedly moved his head from left to right and right to left with his eyes partially closed. Hahahaha typical Indian disposition which kinda insinuates that they are sure of something or from what I believe, bored at what they are doing.

Anyway I spent practically the whole of today sleeping, well with the exception of going out for lunch or taking a pee of course. I was just so worn out, tired and cold. I just keep thinking to myself that I SHOULD BE PRACTICING MY VIOLIN! I'm leaving for Glasgow to study violin in just a month! God I am so nervous! What would my prospective lecturers think of me? Will I make a good impression? Will I take good care of myself? How am I going to cope with the pressure there? Will I work hard or slack off like the lazy arse I am known to be? How will I manage myself? Will I have many friends there as opposed to in Taylor's College where I had close to none?! Yeah, thats right! I was a loner in Taylor's College who ate lunch and smoked by himself while his peers looked at him in contempt. I knew what they were thinking: "Man this guy is a loser. He has no life let alone friends! God I never want to wind up with such a fucked up life like his!" .

I know that I can be superfluously cynical but sometimes it just scares me that my thoughts on myself living independently correlates with matters that my parents usually nag to me about! By God's grace, I hope I shall settle well at the Academy and of course, get well soon. Amen!

I Officially Have a Blog

2007-08-05T03:56:00.000+08:00

Hey guys I officially have a blog! This is my first blog post and I will continue to keep you updated with more posts whenever I am free or feel like it so stay tuned for more posts, well once I get the hang of how this Blogspot.com thing works!

Jia Weii